Valentine’s Day is quickly approaching. Things are awash in red hearts and other messages portending the coming of a holiday invented by a greeting card company to sell more greeting cards. It is also a holiday of maxing out your credit card on long stem roses and chocolate, and wondering if you’ll even have a date for the evening. If you have sleep apnea, though, Valentine’s Day means possibly exposing your date to your CPAP mask and machine, which can be quite a shock for some people. In light of this, here are a few ways to let your date know that you have sleep apnea and undergo CPAP treatment.
Pull Out Your CPAP At The Restaurant
This is an extreme move, but it’s so crazy that it may actually work. Of course, you want to feel out how the date is going, but if you are on a riff and the laughs are coming – pulling out a CPAP mask and strapping it on will just add to the fun. This is a lighthearted way of making it known that you are a sleep apnea sufferer and proud of your CPAP. Sure, your waiter may look at you like you’re insane, but you can’t have romance without at least a little humiliation!
Create A Song and Dance Number About CPAP
Another extreme measure – a measure that can only be pulled off if you have extreme confidence – is to make a little song and dance number about your CPAP. If you are at a restaurant, you could get up and perform it. Sure, this may be the most embarrassing thing in the world, but it may help you get that next date you are after. Most people are looking for brave, adventurous people in a partner, so this may be a great way to tell your date that you undergo CPAP and boost your likability points.
Give Your CPAP A Woman’s Name
There are really only two things that people give female names too: boats and, well, actual women. If you want to broach the subject about your CPAP, you may want to tell your date about “Cindy” or “Samantha.” Of course, these are just options or examples – anything female name can work. You can then tell your date that you have to go back home to “Cindy” or “Samantha.” When your date crumples up her napkin and is ready to leave because she thinks you are married, you can clear things up by telling your date “Cindy” or “Samantha” is your CPAP. After that, relief will set in and you can open up the conversation and CPAP therapy.
Show Her The Stats About CPAP Making You Better In Bed
Of course, the ultimate way to tell your date that you have sleep apnea and undergo CPAP is to show your date the real scientific studies that prove CPAP therapy makes you better in bed. Indeed, CPAP therapy can reduce impotency, it can make you last longer and it can make you more attractive and confident. Of course, when you have scientific proof that you may just be better in bed than other people, your CPAP machine will become an after thought.
If all else fails, tell her CPAP helps your heart.